Category: Life

Dear Mihir…


It took me an year long, to put my thoughts and feelings into words about you Mihir.

You were my boss for 4 years, and yet for all those years, we never ever had any personal conversations. Rarely we had any casual interactions and also whenever we spoke to each other, it was mostly professional. When I saw almost everyone around me having a great rapport with you, I chose to remain the last one, thanks to my introversion !

Today, I wish I would have known you more as a person, and could have shared more about myself. For me, I just followed you, hoping, that many such lost opportunities would come again to know you deeper. But never in my wildest imagination have I ever thought, that you would choose to transcend yourself to heavenly abode. I wish I could have broken through my hesitant shackles, but now all in vain.

In this professional world, where networking is of utmost importance, visibility is the keyword, and asking for growth adds more fuel to one’s career growth, than waiting, yet YOU TOOK GOOD CARE OF ME. And deep down, when I think, one long year down the line of losing you, I crave for that care !

While my mother was struggling with her life in a month long battle, you and the organization ensured that I recieve Zero office calls, so that I could devote full time to her care. Nobody, and absolutely nobody called for office work during those days. While she lost, I grieved, but your such small sensitive gestures ensured, that I am sold to you and the organization for life.

And it was not only me. You took care of everyone in your team across the board, like a father and a leader. I never had to ask you for a promotion or a hike or an appreciation, yet everything came my way. I never had to explain or plead, yet I always felt understood and was satiated. You always took it as a personal task, to ensure how you can augment your each and every team member’s growth. And hence, we always were a great team, as I was fighting for you, and you were fighting for me, in our individual professional battles.

If your life would be turned into a book, I would not even feature as a footnote, and yet, with all gratitude and regret, I must say, you are missed Mihir !

PS : Just a month before, you left us, I got the opportunity, to drive you to your home. And being an automotive buff, as soon as you sat, you pointed, “There is a problem with your car’s suspension”! I had got that resolved within the next few weeks itself Mihir, and was hoping to drive you again, but…

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The Father-Daughter Bond ?


Dear Myra,

A lot of people define our relationship, as a usual Father-Daughter bond. They say, daughters are daddy’s girl; or for fathers, daughters are special. Trust me, I will never reduce my relationship with you to that !

Yes, we share a great rapport. And for each and everything, your first go-to person is “Papa” ! But this not because you are my daughter. I believe, irrespective of your gender, I would have remained the same, in terms of parenting. We have a special bond, and it is largely, because I have put in lots of love, time and effort to earn it. All those hard work and patience can’t be just reduced to a usual Father-Daughter cliche.

So, when you grow-up to understand all this, please put this upfront to all those, who will equate our bond with others with mere Father-Daughter analogy. Because more than it was destiny, our relationship is what we have earned !

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Being Married is just a “State of Mind” !


I am of the belief that the concept of “Marriage” as a social institution, is slowly fading, and in next 20years, it could be an extinct theory. While I mention the word marriage , I refer to its conventional meaning as the legally or formally recognized union of a man and a woman as partners in a relationship. Marriage is conventionally associated with an appropriate age, gender, sex, ceremonies etc. But as I see it, Marriages are beyond these rules and rituals. Being married to someone is a state of mind.

Society expects one to get married under a particular age bracket, even if the person is yet to find a soulmate. Else, they are either coerced or influenced to put with someone (to an opposite gender only), who is atleast “Suitable” under respective societal norms. Marriages are also considered as an societal permit to have sex and henceforth a societal responsibility to reproduce the next generation. And thus many fall into the customary trap built-in through family and peers. Resultant is a huge expansive event ceremony, largely enjoyed and celebrated by the non-protagnists.

I believe, marriage is an emotional connect between two human beings irrespective of any boundaries. One comes across a person with whom he/she chooses to devote their part of life. Marriage is imbibed subconsciously when one feels and performs love, care and respect towards his/her soulmate. The great “Meera bai” was married to “Lord Krishna” and it breaks all marriage myths. The legend of Radha -Krishna was beyond any ceremonial barriers. Most love fables have not resulted in actual wedlock yet no one can disagree of them being not mentally married. Many of today’s generation are moving into Live-In relationships irrespective of when or if they want to get ceremonially married. Their are those, who are into “being married” mode as soon as they propose to their soulmates even before any form of ceremonial wedding. And I also know many, who have shared their lifetime together and are yet not being emotionally wedded to each other. Marriages don’t and shouldn’t be driven by societal norms but should be purely out of love.

Also, marriage is not compulsorily a bond for life. During a relationship, after all genuine efforts, if incompatibility grows into valley of sorrows, the mind itself call it quits. No ceremonial or legal vows can reignite the feeling of being married.

Thus, I hope the society today liberates itself from the strings of existing marriage norms. It is time, parents should stop shoving marriage into their children’s life. Parents and families must allow and trust the younger ones to wait for their time. With no strings attached, sooner or later they would be emotionally connected with someone. As marriage driven by love, is a beautiful phenomena and it will not let anyone seep through it. “Being married – The state of mind” may slowly but surely, would occur atleast once in everyone’s lifetime.

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“Love Jihad”… A step backwards !


Marriages, beyond the ethnic boundaries, were a huge social stigma, in India. A decade earlier, inter-caste and inter-culture marriages were a big no-no; inter-religion marriages were considered blasphemy. Although the laws permit such marriages, yet majority youths of this country were under such extreme social duress, that they didn’t even dare to think about the opposite-sex of different ethnicity. Arranged marriages obeyed sheepishly such unwritten social commandments; love-marriages reluctantly tend to expand the horizon. But with education, travel, globalization and prosperity, the mindsets evolved, and hence love marriages between different caste, cultures and religions were now more acceptable. Our Indian society, although very slowly, was ambling towards anti-endogamy by breaking the social and religious shackles.

But then, bigotries leeched on to our evolving social wisdom, and coined the word “Love-Jihad”. Religious extremists venomously used it as hiring followers and attrition management tool. Media naively shared it, discussed it. Political parties tried scoring points by using it as vote-hoarding tool. And the progression of social evolution was pushed into coma. With the fear of family and relationships being bruised, in this communal crossfire, now every Hindu-Muslim Love-story, would be reassessing its future. Now no more a Muslim boy will dare to ask a Hindu girl out on date. Now no Muslim girl will say yes to Hindu boy’s proposal. Now again, “The Cupid” or “The Kaamdev” has to be selective before any love-infused match-making. Now no family would allow their children to have inter-religion marriage. Even if young couples would dare to go against it, if not the family, the religious extremists may kill them in the name of honor.

It took us ages for our society to gift freedom to newer generations of choosing their soulmates from any ethnicity, but it took only one chapter called Love-Jihad, to take us back to medievalism.

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Halo (Movie) : More Than Meets The Eye !


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I am pretty sure, that not many would have heard of this Hindi movie “Halo” ! Instead many would relate Halo with a video game. Meanwhile, Halo movie, directed by Santosh Sivan (a genius cinematographer), won National award for the “Best Children’s Movie”, yet went unnoticed by the mainstream audiences. This 1996 movie, now rarely gets featured on TV (only on DD National), is stitched to my memory, frame by frame. Halo , now very close to my heart, inspires me every-time. The movie allows me to relive the childlike goodness, we all used to once possess.

The movie is about a young girl “Sasha”, who finds herself lonely after her mother’s death. To her rescue, comes a dog “Halo”, who becomes her God-sent best-friend. Her life now revolves around it. She sleeps, she drinks, she eats with it. But one day, she finds Halo missing, and here starts her quest to find Halo. In the backdrop of Hindu-Muslim riots in Mumbai, and with the help of weird friends and supporting characters, the movie depicts Sasha’s brave and spirited pursuit of finding Halo, her ultimate happiness.

Although, stuck in old-times, story-telling may test your patience, but I will still recommend it to everyone, especially kids. Again, rather saying much, one should watch it to experience it, though I am sure that it will touch hidden chords of one’s stoned heart.

 

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